Wednesday, June 27, 2012


                    "Oh the wheel in the sky keeps on turnin', I don't know where I'll be tomorrow." 

   Wynonna Darling sat most of the afternoon on the second floor of the assisted living for seniors apartment building. She had once been a beautiful woman I thought, with lime green eyes and white hair. Her arms were strangely younger than her body. In five minutes, I learned that her husband was once the owner of an appliance store on Main Street in a small Kansas farming town. He did very well because he was the only one brave enough to open such a store but worked hard his entire life and had died two years ago. "Do you have far to travel?" she asked but before I could answer, she started the conversation over again almost word for word. Where did her tomorrow's go? Yesterday was no longer hers but her mind claimed it anyway. I do that, repeat stories. Oh no! 

      "Realize deeply that the present moment is all you ever have." ~Eckhart Tolle~

Sunday, June 17, 2012

Ghosts on Father's Day

Dad, I worked in the yard most of the day lifting heavy rocks and rearranging earth to keep the tomato plants flourishing. The flowers are vivid with color and it looks like the hostas are ready to be split. You were on my mind much of the time in the hot sun today making me laugh with memories of your hot headedness back in the day when I thought you were a mean old man for grounding me and the time you saved my life from a serious car accident due to a psychic hunch.

Dad, Aunt Bertha popped in while I was showering the mud off my legs but it wasn't until I had my eyes closed and shampoo bubbles were sliding down my neck when my mind's eyes saw her as a young woman. Not the way we remember her with the humped back and black patch over one eye. She was still skinny as a rail, there weren't any cats but she was with Grandma Della holding their stomachs and chuckling about something funny. I wondered if they knew I could see them like a spy peeking into their new dimension.  It didn't click then why I saw them until we were eating dessert tonight after dinner at your house. Banana pudding with vanilla wafers is something I haven't had in years even though I know that recipe by heart.   I wanted to make some but we ran out of time.

"Your Grandma used to make the exact same dessert, do you remember that?" mom asked me. "She sure loved her vanilla wafers." Dad, I should have told you that I saw Aunt Bertha and Grandma especially today since it's Father's Day. They wanted to say hi, give you a salute and the only way they could do it between worlds was with banana pudding I guess. I wanted to tell you. You think that stuff is weird, so I didn't.
  Happy Father's Day, I love you and so does your mom and your aunt. They're having a good time.

Sunday, June 10, 2012

Art Room

     The art room wants to be heard, I think it's the noisiest room in the house but that's where all the fun is....

Saturday, June 9, 2012


Words from others can burn little holes in our hearts or lift our spirits to heights where the clouds are our that why the monks take a vow in silence, preferring to nod and smile?

  Life is a highway! I wanna ride it all night long! The words of others are starting to vibe to an emotion that can't be satisfied. Life reminds me of the crack in a wall that I plastered over only for it to reappear as an even bigger crack a year later with thicker sides thanks to the drywall! That crack is a gentle reminder to me that no matter how good I do my job, how well I think I raised my children, how much love I gave to friends, there is always and I do emphasize always, going to be a crack somewhere thanks to our differences in perception. With that in mind, I am blessed to know of a Hawaiian prayer called the Ho'oponopono which means to make it right. Simple, yet powerful are the words and they change our family's lineage to one of greater love. 
   For tonight, I will not focus on the words of a beautiful person whom I love that temporarily made me look at the crack in the wall on the East side of my house, because I know they were driving in the fast lane when they probably should have been on the shoulder! 

Tuesday, June 5, 2012

In The Garden

     Today was a good day....

Sunday, June 3, 2012

Voice In My Head

It's a long road to the top of the mountain, and if there isn't a phone to let the person on the top know you're on your way, you have to call them with your mind. God does it all the time or sends his messengers, the ones with louder voices because it's way far down below. I hear them, sometimes they play with me as I argue back. They did it once on a Saturday morning in February before breakfast. I was getting ready to work that day at a bookstore where I read people's palms. "Bring your seashell, one of the big ones," a voice whispered. Nope, I'm not, they're mine, I use them to decorate my little down stair's bathroom, nope, not this time. "We know, but just bring one, someone needs it today." I packed my gypsy bag with my bottled water, bananas, nuts, cardboard hand, pointing stick, glasses and lavender spray. "Don't forget the shell." I heard again. I'm going to ignore you, it's my voice in my own head, so you aren't real, gotta run! If you've ever heard the call, it's not pushy but it's hard to forget which is why I turned around and grabbed the starfish, stuffed it in my bag and left.

Driving to the bookstore takes about 35 minutes, I'm usually running ten minutes late and have people waiting for me before I can set the table the way I like. The starfish was placed to the left of the table and I actually forgot about bringing it. Some people are timid as they approach my scary chair because they think I can read their minds but once we hold hands and I thank them for allowing me to help validate what their soul already knows, they start to relax. There were so many clients that day, time erased itself and I went without lunch or water. It was getting dark when my last client arrived. Her name was Honey. She was mystery, dark hair and tattoo kind of mystery with loads of kids. A single mom who was learning about herbs, home schooling, bad men and overcoming a  violent childhood. We clicked immediately and I saw Hawaii in her aura with pineapples and farm living. There would be a safe place for her kids to grow. (She's in Kansas and doesn't own a car I reminded my guides) I handed her the starfish. "This is a gift from Spirit to you," I said. She jumped from her chair, hugged me, cried, laughed and told me that she had asked for a sign in the morning if Hawaii was a good move for her family. I met her son who was too old for his tender fourteen years and told him to leave worry behind, he wasn't the dad anymore. Woooh, my legs were in need of a walk so I packed up and that's when the boy came back in the room with a white rock as a gift for me!
My words had lifted twenty pounds from his body and he was grateful.

Now fast forward because it's June. I went to sleep thinking of the boy, worried about his broken door and  neighborhood. It was like we were having a conversation and the white stone gift giving replayed in my mind. I could see his face clearly and fell asleep with the vision of his smiling face. The next day was another palm reading Saturday so I packed up and thought of the woman named Honey and did she get to Hawaii? You can't imagine my surprise when I saw my table! There sat a yellow starfish with a note "Back to Sandy, From Honey." For a minute I was confused because it was a gift for her but then realized that was Honey's way of letting me know she went to Hawaii!

I realize it would scare us to death if our cell phones rang with a deep voice saying, "Hello, it's God, will you do me a favor?" So He speaks in whispers and the angels pray we hear. That's an awfully big mountain, so if you hear a message, I hope you have the trust to follow through.

Friday, June 1, 2012

A Kiss

Lemon tree...

 He must have known how to kiss her
and that's why the gray room turned yellow
with swooshes of swirled whites, more yellow
until every thing was consumed in lemons

on trays that poured them in the air without
a smell of tartness but her mind claimed the sour
and she dreamed of pies with mounds of meringue

on shelves with butter cookies 
and sweet lemonade in ancient jars
for anyone who wandered
off the street in the bad but fun part of town

His arm cast a gold shadow 
making his veins look like roots of a tree
Her she kissed his sleeping face
and thanked him for the kiss